'I pledge to provide a safe place for you to be 100% yourself, celebrate your flaws and help you find your happy'.

Kerry 💋

The alternative 'Before you’re 40 bucket list'.

The alternative 'Before you’re 40 bucket list'.

As you might guess, I’m not a massive fan of these ’25 things to do before you’re 25’-type articles, I think they're just another layer of unnecessary FOMO and compare-a-thons to deal with.

Who needs that pressure when you’re just tryna escape and relax into a blog? Sheesh 🙄

So I decided to write up an alternative list for you; a list that actually makes you feel good about where you’re at, rather than make you feel you’ve already failed, and time’s ran out before you even start reading it.

[A wee personal note: You’re doing a freaking awesome job of life btw. Just remember that] 👊🏻

So let’s get cracking:

Original bucket list to-do #1: 
Bungee jump, sky dive or complete some other adrenalin-junked activity.

Or you could:

Just feel grateful for your life, exactly as it stands right now, and take a minute to acknowledge that it really is a privilege to be alive. So many people so desperate for that privilege, just have it snatched away y’know? If you're alive reading this, life's good, you're gonna be A-okay.

Original bucket list to-do #2: 
Go on safari in Africa.

Or you could:

Take a minute to consciously recognise how awesome all species are, even the unwelcome spider who’s been living in your car's wing mirror for months. How cool is it that we all just happen to be on the planet at the exact same time, all evolving together and going about our business to just survive and be alive?! 

Original bucket list to-do #3: 
Get married.

Or you could:

Just let relationships and romance take their own natural course. You might get married before 40, you might not, you might never get married at all. It can be the hardest thing ever to train your brain into realising that we all have our own paths to take, and that means we're not going to all do the same things, or if we do the same things, it doesn't have to be at the same time. And that's more than freaking okay! In fact Dame Helen Mirren got married at 52, and she highly recommends it!

Original bucket list to-do #4: 
Go skinny-dipping.

Or you could:

Look at your naked body in the mirror and see it for the majestic beast that it is for a change; the way your skin so cleverly keeps all your organs intact and in-place, the way that your lungs breathe in oxygen all by themselves, the way that you’re able to move yourself around, step by step, without even thinking about it – it’s freaking phenomenal! You should definitely try and work on seeing it as that, way before you're 40.

Original bucket list to-do #5: 
Stay at a 5* luxury hotel.

Or you could:

Sit quietly in your home for a moment and think about all that it does for you – it keeps you warm, it keeps you dry and away from the wind and rain, and it provides a space for all the memories you’ve acquired over the years. It's not a replacement for luxury bedding and room service obvs, but it will make you appreciate how fortunate you are to have a safe-place to sleep.

Original bucket list to-do #6: 
Celebrate New Year’s Eve in a foreign city.

Or you could:

Celebrate New Year’s Eve with one (or more) people that you love, in your pyjamas, eating great food, having some mega giggles, making mega memories and feeling excited about the year to come.

Original bucket list to-do #7: 
Start a family.

Or you could:

Never take the fact that you can have children for granted, or base your success rating in life around having children. It's a wholly magical thing to experience, don't get me wrong, but it's not a right we have, it's a privilege. Not all of us can have children, and not all of us want to either. Pressuring yourself to start a family by a deadline isn't such an effective strategy, because it's totally out of your control. Instead, trying to focus on creating a life surrounded by the people you love and doing things that you love (totally in your control), is a far more effective happiness hack.

Original bucket list to-do #8: 
Challenge yourself to something that seems impossible, like a triathlon, marathon or mountain-climb.

Or you could: 

Pat yourself on the back today, knowing what you’ve achieved just this week seemed completely impossible on Monday. I know it did for me! And in fact, what you manage to pull out of the hat most weeks is damn near impossible before you start out. Go you 💪🏻

Original bucket list to-do #9: 
Buy a house.

Or you could:

Be perfectly fine with your rental, your house-share, your whatever – it's safety, it's shelter and it's where you're lucky enough to rest your head each night. And believe it or not, a mortgage does not a happy-person make! 😂 Of course it can be a satisfying feeling to know you own your own space, but with that comes a huge dollop of pressure, and a huge wallop of responsibility too. Getting on the property ladder because of an age deadline is another pressure you really don't need to be giving yourself.

Original bucket list to-do #10: 
Give up junk food.

Or you could:

Enjoy whatever food you freaking like! 😋 Yes your health is paramount, and we should all be mindful about what we're putting in our bodies, especially as we get older. But if your vice is Krispy Kreme doughnuts, why the hell would you wanna sacrifice the pleasure of them just because of your age? Just get a balance of nutritious food with treat food and you're away! 🍩

The initial list is of course wonderful if you have the means and desires to do all those things, but my point is, your life can be equally as rich and successful to you, without you needing to do any of those things. It always was, and always will be, about how you look at your life, regardless of your age or society ticks on your list.

If you choose to look upon yourself and your life as a failure or a disappointment, then that’s exactly what you’ll see. If you choose to look upon yourself and your life as a continuous opportunity to grow, to enjoy the small things way more than the big things, and to be grateful with whatever you’ve got right now, then that’s exactly what you’ll see. 

If you're on a mission to get your life into gear, my free 5-day life plan mini-course might be right up your street, go take a look! 💋

Big love and all the feels, Kerry :D
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