How to keep going when all you wanna do is give up and quit.
Because let’s face it, wanting to give up and quit is frustratingly often more the rule than the exception! So how can you keep going when it feels like the universe’s screaming at you to quit?
I thought this was a nice follow-on from last week’s post about how to stop beating yourself up, because wanting to give up on something and quit, kinda goes hand in hand with self-beat-uppery. I mean , if you’re pouring allllll your energy into convincing yourself that you’re not ‘enough’, then what’s the freaking point in tryna stay on track with your goals and dreams and aspirations? You can’t do one without working on the other, so if you’re not caught up on the beat-yourself-up-blog-post, make sure you get all up in it today before we crack on 👊
Now you’re hopefully all up-to-date with the program 😉I wanna dive right in and tell it how it is.
Sometimes, it’s okay to quit and change course.
Probably not the first thing you wanna hear in a ‘how to not quit’ blog post 😂 but there’s a reason I opened with this bad boy. I want you to pay close attention to how you felt reading that. Did you feel relief that I kinda gave you permission to quit? Or did you feel defiant in wanting to prove me (and maybe your inner critic) wrong? Your instant, gut reaction to that statement will tell you a lot about where you’re at and what you want – which is progress in itself. And y’know, sometimes it IS okay to quit and change course. Sometimes it’s absolutely the right thing to do to try something new.
Case in-point was my business circa 2016. It looked very different to what it does now. I owned a paper goods design studio creating greeting cards, giftware and all things papery. I exhibited at trade shows and had my products stocked in stores around the world believe it or not. And since 2013, that’s exactly what I’d hoped to create. Until I became a mother and everything changed. That year, the business began to grow and I was propositioned by some epic chain stores and retailers to carry my lines, but instead of feeling excitement, I felt dread. And because I’m now pretty well-versed on listening to my instincts 😇 I didn’t think twice about stepping away, ‘quitting’ and trying something new. And voila, here we are living it up in The Imperfect Life®! 🍸
Get crystal clear on what you want and why you wannit.
I think when we’re in pursuit of something we want, it’s ridiculously easy to get distracted and diverted off-course, almost by the very nature of working towards something! Like it’s supposed to test how much we want it by flinging all sorts of super-attractive, shiny objects at us! And then if it’s a case that you’ve gone off-track that step too far, and you’ve forgotten what it was that you were wanting in the first place, then stop honey. Please stop. Take a pause to get crystal clear on what it is that you want.
I talk a lot about staying tuned into your ‘why’ in The Imperfect Life® Planner and the upcoming course The Imperfect Life® Designer – because it genuinely is your superpower when you’re trying to create positive change in your life. Why? Because without it, you’ve got nothing to fight for honey! By proxy, going after something you want is meant to challenge you, it’s meant to push you to your limits and it’s meant to make you fight for it. So feeling really strongly about why you want it, is how you’re gonna make it happen. If your why is so unfaltering, it doesn’t matter what beef you have to battle, you’ll remind yourself why you’re in the trenches, and you’ll dust yourself and jump back up for more beefage. So if you wanna keep going for this thing, wop that why out, give it a hug, tell it that mama’s coming, and just. keep. swimming until you get it.
Know that things don't have to be perfect.
Most of the blog posts I write involve a bit of honest talking-to-yourself, and this one is no exception my friend. So I want you to ask yourself, honestly, if you’ve been thinking of giving up and quitting on something, is it just because you’ve not ‘made it’ yet? Is it just because you’ve not yet had your moment to say “Ta-da! Look what I did!” to the world? Is it just because things are frustratingly taking too long and don’t feel all neat and tidy and perfect yet? If I’m anywhere close to your truth with this, then this is not your time to give up and quit honey. It’s supposed to take time.
And I say this, because I know your frustration is everything to do with how you’re looking at things at this point in time. Remind yourself that things do not have to be perfect. I mean, just look at where you are from a year ago, two years ago, five years ago, 10 years ago…you are progressing, you are moving forward, and that’s all you need to remember.
Say you wannabe a writer, but you don’t feel like a writer yet and you wanna quit because you’ve not yet been published. If you’re spending your days writing, and continually researching and improving your technique, then as far as I’m concerned – you’re a freaking writer! It doesn’t have to be perfect. Say you wannabe an actor, but you don’t feel like an actor yet and wanna quit because you’ve not yet been ‘discovered’. If you’re spending your days in local amateur dramatics groups, and continually researching and improving your technique, then as far as I’m concerned – you’re a freaking actor! It doesn’t have to be perfect. Say you wannabe an entrepreneur, but you don’t feel like an entrepreneur yet and wanna quit because you’ve not yet been able to go full-time on your business. If you’re spending your days connecting with your audience, building your tribe, and continually researching and improving your strategy, then as far as I’m concerned – you’re a freaking entrepreneur! It doesn’t have to be perfect. You just need to keep going.
PS, Just so you know, you are insanely more than enough, right where you’re at right now xo
Learn to recharge, not roll over.
Overwhelm is a b*tch. Crikey is she. She’s an overbearing, uninvited party guest that does not get the hint when it’s time to go home. And if your urge to give up is simply down to being overworked, underpaid and feeling overlooked, then I’d really recommend learning the art of #selfcare instead of rolling over and quitting. Because it might just be all you actually need.
I’ve definitely been guilty of this on more than one occasion. And yes, that means on more than one occasion, I’ve sat myself down and said ‘C’mon now Kerry, are we reeeeally gonna keep going with this? Are we really gonna keep pulling ourself through this wringer and strapping ourself into this insane rollercoaster? Is it not time to just live a normal life, give up on this dream and quit?’. But when I reach these moments, it’s more often than not a result of total burnout. So no wonder my mind and body is forcing me to question everything. I, like every other human, needs a moment to stop. Unplug. Tune out. Turn off. In that order 😁and even if just me typing that gives you a sense of longing for peace, tranquility and stillness, then you know what you need to do.
So all in all, I really hope this post has given you a chance to think about why you’re thinking of giving up and quitting. Getting to the root cause of these feelings is the only way you’ll be able to make the right decision for you. Is it through feelings of complete dread and almost acting against your instincts, or is it more just down to a fixable issue of impatience or overwhelm?
If you enjoyed today’s post, I’d absolutely LOVE to hear your bestest bit in the comments below! I mean, what can I say, a girl loves to know if she’s helping 😇
Until next weekend cutiepatootie 💋